17 [this game]

[DD]

lol my karma

huge update coming soon

[DD]

Okay so let's get down to it! I feel as though my confessional has been pretty solid up until this point, so it sucks that I was out of town for this particular vote and couldn't write as much. I am going to try and go through it here.

So anyway, I can say the vote was kind of a blur until I went to bed the night that I won immunity. People were saying 600 different things and nothing was being decided. I was trying to piece in my mind what I wanted in the game going forward, and what I thought the best moves were, for myself, going to the end. While I trusted Judd and didn't even think of voting for Kourtney, I went to sleep knowing full well that I needed both idols out of the game. I started working the next morning.

I heard from Kim and Sydney that Vee was playing her idol regardless, so I basically accepted it as fact. Kim and Sydney are two people who have been very "in the know" throughout the entirety of the game, so if they both said something was true I knew it was basically happening. That left me with Judd's idol. I started talking to Sydney about the possibilities of it being played, and what we'd do about it in the future, considering Judd's loyalty to Sean. Sydney essentially blew of the entire conversation. She had no concern for it considering she knew that it'd never be used against her. Meanwhile, Kim was working on getting votes against Judd to get rid of the idol, and I hopped right on board. I had to do what I had to do - I had to flush the idols.

So now there was a vote or Judd decided, and the following 7 were voting for him: Kim, Miki, Shawna, Vecepia, Colby, Chase and myself. Kim, Miki and Chase were pushing for Kourtney, which was a really safe vote. Sydney and Candice were immune, and there was a huge threat of Judd playing the idol on Sean. I didn't want Alex to leave nor did anyone else so it wasn't going to be him. I got word from Sydney that Judd was keeping the idol, so all day I begged Kim and Miki to vote for Sean but they were too worried. Eventually they just told me they were voting for Kourtney. I don't think they knew how hard it was for me, but it almost makes me want to vote one of them out for it. I feel like those two hardly ever listen to me. Anyway, I had to make a choice. Either Shawna and I could flip back for the second vote, and take out Chase or Colby, or just take out Kourtney. We figured it would be best not to lie to every single person in the game... so we voted Kourtney. Wow @ the backlash.

Basically Judd and Kourtney both hate me now, and Sydney wants nothing to do to me. I don't even know how to approach Candice and Sean. I did some damage control with Alex but he already doesn't seem keen on voting for Sydney. Sydney's mostly mad at me because I had been talking with Judd about voting her out. I told her that I only said that stuff to Judd because he made a final 3 with Kim and I, but she didn't even acknowledge it. She's pissed at me and I know she wants revenge. Fortunately, everyone's basically done with her controlling and vindictive nature, so she's slated to be gone next. Unfortunately for me, she may have an idol.

Judd told Animal (a very close friend of mine) that he passed off his idol at the last minute. That was after the vote. However, he told Kim before the vote that he was keeping the idol. Therefore, I'm calling BS. I think that he said that knowing Animal would tell me, but it still really worries me. I want to split the vote this round because I'm 100% sure that if the idol is played I'll be the one going home. I guess it could be Chase but I really think that people are mostly mad at me. I will need to trust Alex 100% to split the vote and that's hard for me. If we can't trust Alex then he could easily fuck me over, though I'm hoping he'd at least have the decency to keep me in the game. Who knows, though?

Anyway, I feel very vulnerable this round. I can already see it coming down to people staying loyal and taking out a threat; then again, things are always changing in this game so you never know! We'll see what happens when immunity results are announced, the I predict that Vee will win it.

Additionally, something I like to do is when I make an iffy move like that, is justify it. I don't necessarily need to prove that it was the right move; rather, I like to put the move in a positive light so if I ever need to explain it to people, it can make the most sense. Voting Kourtney out was very tough, but if I didn't do it, and we voted out Sean instead, what would have happened. Judd still would have told Sydney that I was never intending on taking her to the end, and Kourtney would probably be equally pissy toward Shawna and I. We could try and mend KISS back together, but it could never happen. So basically, leaving Kourtney in the game over Sean would've done nothing for me because I would have had the same amount of enemies after the vote. It sucks that I had to hurt someone that I can probably no longer call a close friend, but that's the game. Kourtney and I really grew close in this game so I do hope that someday we can mend our friendship.

Um I guess that's all for now. Kim and I are working on Alex and getting him to agree to split the vote. It's such a safe strategy so I'm really hoping it works. I've worked hard to be this far so I'd hate to leave because of a hidden immunity idol, especially since I took such risks last round to get them out of the game.

[DD]

Pretty sure she's won. If I get idoled out......

[DD]

Candice, Sean and Sydney should be the next three to leave the game given the current alliances. This is the one time, above all others, that I really really hope things don't change. Plus, it'd be awesome to knock out people who made it really far the first time. Two runner-ups and a third place! Anyway, I'm just kind of hoping people (including Alex) stick to the plan at this point. I'd hate to leave because of an idol but if it happens, it happens. I'd much rather be taken out for the moves I've made, or because I'm a threat.

Anyway, my goal for this vote is just maintenance. I need to build the relationships I have.

[DD]

The other side is definitely voting for me, and we're all voting for Candice. Wish me luck!

[DD]

People really need to stop saying shit to Animal. Like obviously he's going to tell me! Anyway, Animal was in a skype call with a few people (including Jonas) and Alexis came into the call. She told everyone in the call that Vee was doing something crafty this round, and that Danielle would be the one leaving the game. Uh oh!

I told Kim so she'd talk to Miki and Vee about it. She has a way better chance of figuring that shit out than I do. I wish I knew what "crafty" meant because that could imply that she's doing something other than just flipping sides. I'm not really sure what, since it seems like 8 people are voting for Candice. Obviously if their side has the idol, then she'd just tell them to play that. So that sucks.

I really don't know what the right option is right now but my mind is completely open - anything to stay in the game. I would even vote out Vee if I thought the numbers were there, but so far I would only have Kim, Alex, Shawna and myself on board for that. Miki would take a lot of convincing, and I don't know if Colby would do it without Chase, and I know Chase wouldn't. UGH WHY WOULD VEE DO THIS?

I don't get it. This is more suspect than the Judd-passing-the-idol-thing. Like, Alexis would only be hurting Vee by telling other people that situation, so unless it was true why bother? Unless Vee lied to Sean, and Alexis heard it from him? I don't even know.

All I know is that I have a decent shot of leaving the game tonight, which sucks. I'll be doing whatever I can to survive, though.

[DD]

Well it appears as though Vee told Alexis she was voting me out, because Alexis was begging her to do so! It doesn't really bother me that much but it's a little funny that Alexis would stoop so low. I'll be pretty pissed if Vee does it now to please the jury, when doing it later would benefit her game so much more. Regardless, I intend on holding my head high and keeping everything within the context of the game. It's always been about the game for me, and I've maintained that, so it'd be pretty hypocritical to do anything else anyway (not to mention extremely classless.)

Anyway, Vee is maintaining to Kim that she is going to keep me here, because if nothing else, if I left, Kim would go home next. I feel pretty good about the argument being presented that way, because it basically says, "I know what the consequences are of voting out Danielle." If I go tonight I definitely wouldn't consider it a blindside, but I feel better than I did a couple of hours ago. Here's hoping!

[DD]

[Andrea]

Wrong, I was the first to see this.

Invite her to play orgs!

[Host Lex]

YO CASSIE HMU I LOOK JUST LIKE PETE