Episode 4

[Shawna Mitchell]

The Gwad Gods

There is really no other way to describe what happened in the Reward Challenge last night. Things were controlled from the start and a select group, along with their allies, decided who went where.

Okay, I shouldn't be complaining because I ended up in a good spot, I believe. On an 8 person tribe there are 4 original Baci and one major target - Elyse. Those seem like good odds.

It really did give me (and everyone else) more insight into where I stand in this game - overall, as well as in my "core alliance." The alliance of DD/Sydney/Kourtney/Shawna isn't a bad one. I like them all (yes Kourtney's really grown on me), I still feel some loyalty at this point...just maybe not as much as I did before.

Unfortunately, it reminds me a lot of Sausage Island III, except in that game I was definitely an outsider. Enemy to the massive Salchicha alliance. In this game, I've at least broached the inner walls of the Kingdom. My assigned spot inside those walls is becoming ever clearer.

During the challenge, Kourtney wanted to form a chat with K.I.S.S. Yes, I can tell you now because it doesn't look like there will be a cute graphic made for this anytime soon. The name comes from the first initials in our names, with the exception of Danielle's....so the I is supposed to represent her cleavage. Kinda fitting us to the name instead of the other way around. So anyway, that's what I'm going to use to describe this alliance from now on (KISS).

So, at first I'm thinking, oh good! We can all get back on the same tribe. I mentioned this to DD and she immediately countered with the fact, if it failed, it could end up tragically. At that point, my first thought was this was bullshit. If you have a chance to form your own tribes, you try to get the results you want. Well, I am sure that was exactly what DD's intentions were - getting their tribe set up with their favorite people and getting Baci set up to do their bidding, as well.

Back in our KISS chat, Kourtney is very enthusiastic and exclaiming how the four of us can be together again, etc etc. No agreement voiced by DD or Sydney. At this point, that's what I'm expecting. Then, in the chat this:

DDanielle
do either of you wanna go to poseidon?
or baci?

Sydney
i dont think any of us

DDanielle
or gwad? lmao

Sydney
on poseidon

DDanielle
may 2-2
gwad baci?

Shawna Mitchell
I want gwad

DDanielle
me too haha

Kourtney
Gwad wouldn't be bad
Danielle you can go with Shawna to Gwad and I guess Sydney and I can go to Baci?

Sydney
i wanted gwad too lmao

DDanielle
hmmm

Kourtney
We all did
Lol

Sydney
however
wouldnt mind baci

Kourtney
I wouldn't either

Really Danielle? No, I don't think any of us wanted to be placed on the Poseidon Tribe with all the other misfits/rejects of your perfect community. Thanks, anyway. But, the basic translation of this conversation is: Kourtney feels closest to Sydney, DD and Sydney have already decided they are both going to Gwad and Kourtney and I will go to Baci.

Okay, I did try to make DD feel bad by asking her on the side why she didn't want me on Gwad. Maybe I shouldn't have alerted her to the fact I was feeling at all rejected by her...but I really did want to put her on the spot and make her feel a little bit uncomfortable - and just have to try to explain herself. I also kind of want her to think of me as kind of a lost puppy who feels dependent on her good graces to help me out in the game....which, hopefully, will not end up being my role.

DDanielle
what if
we gave u and kourt sean

Shawna Mitchell
there are 3 more gwads, i know one is the last but jw why you don't want me there lol

DDanielle
would that ease your nervs?
omg
if you think you can get first
please
i would LOVE you there
i just thoguht
us 4 girls
2-2
we are socially good so we're ifne
but if you were there over syd

Shawna Mitchell
okay np i just wondered

DDanielle
that would be fine as well
i just
am
freaking out
about elyse
she scares me so much :-(

Shawna Mitchell
im not that close w/ sean

DDanielle
hoenstly i may even want you more on gwad than syd
BUT
it hink we're good

Basically, this made it even more clear to me that DD/Sydney would end up with their "real buddies" on Gwad and Kourtney and I would end up on Baci, which wasn't a bad tribe for me - at this point in the challenge, it already had Chase and Super Succubus, Elyse who is always a great target to have around.

So, as the challenge wore on, and DD/Sydney/Vee/Wanda/Miki decided where people should be placed. (Obviously there was a chat I was not invited to, lol), and Kourtney and I assisted in this master plan, along with fellow co-conspirators like Wanda, Alexis, Sean. I am making guesses to some extent here, but part of it is based on confirmed information and part of it is based on rumors which flew around like crazy last night.

Rob C was used as a pawn in this game and landed the last spot on Poseidon, which he did not appreciate. Apparently, Vee and Alexis made a deal with Rob C where he would be in the F3. Alexis was supposed to go to Poseidon and he would either win and go to Gwad, or take the Outcast spot (not sure which). My rope chop right before I was killed and sent to Baci sent him into a rage at me. How dare I chop his rope after he only chopped me twice and I said the words "we're even." I didn't mean it literally, dude. Sorry, but it was you or me going to Poseidon and it was not going to be me! I had to play along.

Last night, Elyse worked for an alliance to keep herself safe. So much information was given by her, then Ted, I did pass things along to KISS and then Kim unloads on Ted, who passes it to Elyse, and it is obvious that all this info went from DD/Syd to Kim - the Final Three that Elyse told me about. I understand Elyse will say/do whatever she thinks will help her out, but I do think a lot of her info is accurate. It makes a lot of sense knowing how DD and Sydney both play and now understanding Kim has history with both.

Honestly, even with the events of last night and all the drama, plus my declining faith in an alliance I actually believed in in the very beginning, I feel I am in a good spot at this point. I know things will shift - again - but I don't think I am in immediate danger on my current tribe.

Kind of funny that I wanted to kind of "distance" myself from Chase at the beginning but, reconnecting with him last night really made me remember why we got along so well in Season 3. He's a smart guy. He's not a blind follower. He's got some innovative ideas and he doesn't just accept things at face value, but wants to dig deeper and make his own decisions. It reminded me that I may feel swallowed up in a sea of DD/Sydney/Kim supporters but I don't have to be. It may not get me better placement than Season 3 but, at least I have a little more of an inside edge this time. I'd like to infiltrate and shake things up eventually. And anyway, I'm never into - oh, I hope I make Jury! I always set out to win and that's the only place I ever strive for, no matter how it looks on the outside.

My other option, of course, is to change my avatar to Sekou, not participate in challenges or talk to anyone, update my boot list occasionally, and venture into Mt Andouille when I feel like my time could be up.

[Shawna Mitchell]

I had this crazy dream last night. I dreamt Kourtney was upset at me for minor disagreements about the challenge. Nothing big at all...but anyway, I dreamt she posted in our tribe camp about how she was voting me out and everyone else should do the same.

Moral: You know you're too into an ORG when you start dreaming about it..

PS - I won't go into the dream about Boston Rob (the real BR) the other night.

Yeah, I should probably stop playing these things, lol.

[Shawna Mitchell]

Okay, so....I am really not happy right now. Not just cause we lost but what we lost to. I definitely recognized some things we could've improved on but I think our idea/board/effort was definitely better than the sausage v taco idea. I mean c'mon I even mentioned that idea but it was so obvious & cliche I dismissed it. Plus, the concept was OTT and not doable. It was like reaching for the most outlandish thing that really would not work in a game and it won because it was "different"...yeah, maybe, but would that ever happen? I doubt it.

Not trying to be a poor sport but we worked our asses off and this is why I hate subjective challenges./endrant

So, now to vote someone off. whatever...at this point I'm so pissed lol. (maybe not /endrant)

[Shawna Mitchell]

This TC... it is what it is. I am not happy we lost...but it'll probably take me a bit of time to get over it. Probably like 27 hours or so.
Anyway, I kind of wanted Elyse to stay. Kind of. The part of me that's all about "fairness" and wanting to reward the people who busted ass in the challenge, and are busting their ass to stay in the game wants to save Elyse.

But, that's the part of me I need to tell to STFU right now. How does it benefit me to keep Elyse and how does it benefit me to vote her off?

Well, she may be a potential ally if she stays and I certainly know she is a big target and would do whatever she can to soil the images of Sydney, Danielle, Kim and whoever else she sees supporting them.

I don't want to be a blind follower here but is that really what this is about? Is taking a stand to defend Elyse realllly going to help MY game? I have to be selfish here, and I have to think more about how I can get further.

I can either try to help Elyse and alienate my allies or I can go with the flow in this vote. I feel like that is the smarter move if no one else is in the Elyse camp. Is sticking out as an Elyse-supporter good for me? I don't think it is.

I'm not saying in any way that I want to keep all the people in the game that will do Sydney/DD's bidding but I have to choose my battles. And this one is really not worth it to me.

Sure, by eliminating Elyse, we keep Wanda and Eliza in the game....but it will also show my "core alliance" I 100% support them. I want that trust and this is not the time to make waves.

So, if all goes as planned, Elyse is gone. I'm sad about it but, then again, Elyse would cut my throat in a hearbeat if she felt it would save her. I have no fantasies that she would be a good ally to me if I needed her to help me out. I have to look at where my bread is buttered at the moment.

[Shawna Mitchell]

Kourtney Moon enters the volcano!! Does she get it? Is she off her rocker? Is she smarter than the average bear??

More to come.

Okay she says it didn't go well but she's a liar...lol. Still, I doubt she got it but I'll keep my ears to the ground.

[Shawna Mitchell]

Chat w/ Judd, Sean & Kourt. Elyse was the decided vote.

Chat w/ Ellyse, Judd, Kourt & Wanda. Elyse trying for one of Eliza, Chase or Sean. Wanda would rather vote Chase. Wanda says - okay Eliza is fine.

Does Elyse not realize this is just too easy? I admire her tenacity but it's a losing battle.

I did ask Kourtney who she'd want to vote off after Elyse leaves and Alexis joins our tribe (a probability) and she said Wanda. not sure if I believe this (part of me does) but I still think the Elyse vote is going to happen no matter what.

[Shawna Mitchell]

Hmmm discord in KISS

DDanielle
so basically
kourtney threw a tantrum
(this needs to be like super DLed)

Shawna Mitchell
of course

DDanielle
and basically straight up asked sydney
if she would take her to the end over us

[/center]


More later. Going to bed.

[Shawna Mitchell]

I don't like to just post a bunch of conversations but I feel like this is last minute vote drama and I want to post it.

Elyse & I:

Elyse
So

Elyse
I hear I'm getting votes
Including yours
Which is sadly unsurprising.

Shawna Mitchell
well, actually there was nothing I could do about that
Im sorry

Elyse
Well, I'd say that it's fine
But I legitimately don't believe that there's nothing you could do
Not voting for me is something you could do
Having your own brain is something you could do.

Shawna Mitchell
well technically that is true
and yes i do have a brain

Elyse
Okay, using it for your own benfit is something you could do.
But, mneh. As I said, not surprising.

Elyse
I thought I'd be outta here like day one, so I've already done better than anybody expected.

Elyse
I do really regret helping out with that challenge, thuogh.
But, that's what I get for assuming that you guys were interested in winning

Shawna Mitchell
well, obviously we tried to win.

Elyse
Whoa, you're right.
I should give you a medal.
That totally absolves you of this situation.

Shawna Mitchell
idk why i need to be "absolved"


Elyse
Because you're voting off someone who has worked their butt off for this tribe
And taking the pathetic "It wasn't my fault" route about it

Shawna Mitchell
I know you did

Elyse
And, what?
That just doesn't mean as much as your crosstribe alliances?
You'd rather just keep losing?
I mean, really, there's no reason you can give me why this isn't bull

and simultaneously Chase & I:

Chase Rice
Ok I'm just voting elyse cause Sean isn't on board at all

Shawna Mitchell
oh hey

Shawna Mitchell
yeah no one has been around since i got home
i didnt ever see sean today
and he seemed all happy with the elyse vote

Shawna Mitchell
did you tell elyse?

Chase Rice
No she just imed me like 5 seconds ago saying she thinks she's getting votes
And I said I don't want her to leave
But that's it

Chase Rice
People told her they were voting Eliza didn't they?

Shawna Mitchell
yeah
well w/e

Chase Rice
She wants to know who is voting her?

Shawna Mitchell
idk who told her but im not going to lie to her - i told her i did

Chase Rice
What should I say?

Shawna Mitchell
Elyse
So


Elyse
I hear I'm getting votes
Including yours
Which is sadly unsurprising
Shawna Mitchell
well, actually there was nothing I could do about that
Im sorry


Elyse
Well, I'd say that it's fine
But I legitimately don't believe that there's nothing you could do
Not voting for me is something you could do
Having your own brain is something you could do.




Shawna Mitchell
well technically that is true
and yes i do have a brain


Elyse
Okay, using it for your own benfit is something you could do.
But, mneh. As I said, not surprising.



Elyse
I thought I'd be outta here like day one, so I've already done better than anybody expected.


idk why i'm supposed to be her savior - no one wanted to keep her

Chase Rice
Wanda wants to keep her

Shawna Mitchell
she does?

Chase Rice
Yea

Shawna Mitchell
well then maybe she told her

Chase Rice
Do you wanna force a tie?
Cause I will

Shawna Mitchell
where is wanda?

Chase Rice
Idk Ted is the one who told me

Shawna Mitchell
well at this point, she's all pissed at me, i dont really feel like keeping her
(did you make an alliance with her?)

Chase Rice
Who?

Shawna Mitchell
elyse

Chase Rice
She approached me 5 seconds into tribe swap and offered one. She left me no choice

Shawna Mitchell
okay, just asking

Chase Rice
Like we were the first 2 on the tribe and she asked then

Chase Rice
I'm not saying I WANT to keep her. I just don't wanna leave us with no options

Shawna Mitchell
yeah i mean i hear you - but I felt like it was definitely going to happen no matter what
and no one else is around - has been around since i've been home
im not blamingyou at all. i know you have problems more important than this game, but I didn't really know what was going on with you and couldn't talk to you about it besides a few seconds today

Chase Rice
Yea I know. Ill just vote elyse and regroup tomorrow

Shawna Mitchell
well talk to me...
i had no idea wanda was not voting her....

Chase Rice
How are you?

Shawna Mitchell
you said earlier you wanted to talk to sean
this is the first i've heard of wanda

Chase Rice
I did but he wants to trust you and kourt he said

Shawna Mitchell
so idk im just kind of surprised at this news
who does?

Chase Rice
Ted told me Wanda came to him and said were voting elyse and she doesn't want to

Shawna Mitchell
ohh
okay
sorry you said that

Chase Rice
Haha right

Shawna Mitchell
idk i actually was hoping we could do something and not just "do what other certain people want to do" but i saw no inkling anyone else would change until now/today

Chase Rice
Sean wants to get out Wanda next round though

Shawna Mitchell
(you earlier)

Chase Rice
Right

Shawna Mitchell
hm
well wanda never talked to me either
im just like arrgh

Chase Rice
Yea I just feel bad saying anything cause I know y'all worked so hard in the challenge

Shawna Mitchell
and now elyse is just being a bitch so i feel like why do i want to keep someone who hates me now?

Chase Rice
So I feel guilty a lil but honestly

Shawna Mitchell
obviously that didn't matter to anyone who wants to vote elyse

Shawna Mitchell
it does bother me for sure
but last night it was all - elyse.period from anyone i talked to
why do you thnk sean wants to vote wands?
just curious

Chase Rice
What bothers you?

Shawna Mitchell
eliza has barely been around

Shawna Mitchell
voting elyse when she worked so hard bothers me

Chase Rice
Cause Sean told me

Shawna Mitchell
but it's not just about my "feelings" either

Chase Rice
Directly
He said Judd hates Wanda so we can swing him

Shawna Mitchell
ohh
i didnt know that

Chase Rice
So we could pull Wanda or Judd I think

Shawna Mitchell
you mean next round?

Chase Rice
Yes
I voted elyse

Shawna Mitchell
are you invisible?
i dont see you on the board

Chase Rice
No I told lex and he said it was fine

Shawna Mitchell
oh you're on your phone?
i should know because no blue text

Chase Rice
It's raining so hard that I pulled off

Shawna Mitchell
did you tell elyse you did?

Chase Rice
No I just told her I'd brb

Shawna Mitchell
oh

Chase Rice
Idk what to say

Shawna Mitchell
Chase, I really wanted something else to happen last night and maybe i suck but with the people around & online (besides wanda) I really thought there was no chance anyone would ever want to keep her

Chase Rice
To her

Shawna Mitchell
they were so gung ho about it

Chase Rice
No it's cool. Idc about elyse at all

Shawna Mitchell
who said they wanted to trust kourtney?

Chase Rice
Sean

Shawna Mitchell
oh
well he might want to think that over

Chase Rice
Yea for real

Chase Rice
As long as you or I don't go. Idc what happens to anyone else in this game

Shawna Mitchell
i kept thinking, what's going to happen after elyse is gone and it's all buds on this tribe - but kourtney said she wants to vote wanda next too
i would have rather just voted eliza
and i feel like we maybe have one more round before we swap again
and elyse...is elyse
she might be guilt-tripping me now but she'd cut my throat in a second
and if it was me or her, she wouldn't feel bad that i worked in the challenge either

Chase Rice
Exactly

Shawna Mitchell
sorry just kind of venting

Chase Rice
No you're good. I feel the same way

Chase Rice
I just keeping being afraid we're headed for this hopeless situation like last time

Shawna Mitchell
i know exactly what you're saying
because I have been thinking of ways to avoid that
trust me
and this is what i said about you in my conf:
one sec i'll show you
reconnecting with him last night really made me remember why we got along so well in Season 3. He's a smart guy. He's not a blind follower. He's got some innovative ideas and he doesn't just accept things at face value, but wants to dig deeper and make his own decisions.
which is 100% true and it's why i was so happy to have someone who would think outside the box around again

Shawna Mitchell
so yeah do i feel this vote is kind of sheep following what "everyone else says?"
yep
and i guess that makes me a sheep right now

Chase Rice
Yea I think the same about you also. I just know you're open to pull moves and I can talk to you without you twisting my words
I can vent

Shawna Mitchell
sean seems to trust 100% that it's going to be original baci...which is good when there are four of us...but it'd be nice to have someone else who isn't going to just do what they all say
but i didnt know judd hates wanda
and you dont like judd right?
actually i take that back
i have no idea what sean thinks at all - i rarely talk to him

Shawna Mitchell
but he was leading the charge w/ kourt last night about the elyse vote

Chase Rice
Yea he says he wants to change his 'turncoat' image

Shawna Mitchell
okay that's cool
but yeah

Chase Rice
Which is just what I except a turncoat to say
Boom

Shawna Mitchell
haha true
:-P
boom toasted

Chase Rice
We gotta bring that back

Shawna Mitchell
if i trusted elyse more i'd have worked harder tbh
well tried to keep her
and not just went, well i dont think this vote is worth sticking out over
i dont trust her at all

Chase Rice
Yea true. I don't know her at all

Shawna Mitchell
I get it but it's like, she is trying to work the - dont be a blind follower argument but she wants us to blindly do her bidding so she can get back with her real allies (imo)

Chase Rice
Who are her real allies?

Shawna Mitchell
and where is wanda if she cares so much?
from what i hear, coach, mary, ted
which i gues s you know way better than me since you were on that tribe

So, I love Chase and I trust him to a certain point...however. Something about this tells me he is very tight with Elyse, Coach, Mary, Ted...and idk who else. And that he isn't telling me everything. He's trying to hard to get me to change this without really looking like he's trying hard. I feel like he would talk to me wayyy more openly if this wasn't the case. I don't blame him for making allies without me - we never agreed to anything in this game...but he can't blame me, either.

I said I didn't want to be a sheep, which I don't...but I don't want to be their sheep, either. I have made alliances and I'm not throwing them over this early for no good reason. And especially not to help Elyse...or Coach, Mary and Ted.

I do want to keep this conversation with Chase to myself, though. I still want him around and don't want to give DD/Syd or Kourt any reason to want to get rid of him right now.

[Shawna Mitchell]

I had an Eliza vote ready to post just in case...because I was wondering why Elyse didn't try to bluff about having found the idol. I figured she may have it since she didn't say anything...but that was probably her "bluff."

Anyway, I am sorry to have voted her out but only on a personal level. I know a lot of people don't like her but I have no problem with her and I'm not here to take out "other people's threats." But, that being said, I didn't need to stick my neck out to help her when I couldn't trust her.

It's important I am seen as part of the Borg to certain people right now...you know, assimilated like the other good Gwad followers.

I would have liked to switch things up but only if I thought it was really going to benefit me. I just didn't see it in this vote.

[Shawna Mitchell]

LOL I just liked this for some reason.